I've fallen for a fallen angel. It's not pretty. I'm not proud of it. But there it is.

I was thinking, as I contemplated my latest inappropriate attraction, that no part of "in league with the devil," especially when taken literally, should be attractive. And yet, here I am.

I've begun watching a show called Hex; it's a British television series and the best description I could use would be, sort of like Charmed, but way, way better. And instead of a half-human, half-demon we have a fallen angel. There's really nothing wrong with that. But I've begun to think back to my obsession with demons, devils, and lords of darkness and I think it all starts with Tim Curry. Frankly, I'm blaming every inappropriate crush I've ever harbored in my life on Legend. As my brilliant friend pointed out, once cloven hooves don't throw you off, you're done for.

Legend, the Ridley Scott movie from the '80's staring a very young Tom Cruise flashing a whole lot of thigh, revolved around the main characters, Jack and Lily, two unicorns, and the classic battle between light and dark. Within this battle, as within every battle between good and evil, the female character, Lily in this case, faces and survives loss of innocence. Here's where everything goes so very, very wrong. When I was but a wee lass, I would watch Legend (it had swords and unicorns: awesome) over and over again. I liked Jack alright, he was the hero, but the Lord of Darkness, played by Tim Curry fascinated me and...well...he made me feel funny.

The first time you see him in the movie he steps out of a mirror and stands glorious with horns, man-beast features, a six pack, and cloven hooves. I kinda liked it.

In all honesty, though, I think it had to do with his attempts to bring out the worst in Lily, certainly a quality I should not find attractive, but in my wee years the idea of a man, beast, whatever, promising to free me, entice me, and whatever me (I couldn't quite comprehend just what all was being promised in my youth) seemed infinitely more cool than Jack, the man who wanted her to behave, maintain the balance of light and dark and generally preserve the goodness in the world. Boring.

Many years and much wisdom later I see the fault in finding the Lord of Darkness hot. Really I do. The problem is, I watch Hex and there is the fallen angel, brooding, smoldering, and just generally hot-ing all over the place. I try to cling to the knowledge I've fought and struggled for throughout my life. I try to remember that dating a devil, demon, or any variation thereof is unacceptable. But he stands in the shadows and yearns so powerfully and then I totally forget. This is why if I ever do meet a vampire I will totally die.
He'll pop out of the alley and give me a come hither look, and instead of fighting him, recognizing him, or otherwise resisting him (which would lead of course to a tension filled courtship followed by his falling in love with me and general redemption through the healing powers of the vagina) I would just walk in to the alley smiling like an idiot and thinking "you're pretty." Then he rips out my throat and I die.

I'm so Lucy and not Mina. Damn you Gary Oldman as Dracula!

If I ever die of a strange "animal attack" and my body is found naked in some woods (or desert) somewhere please remember this post and know I stupidly went to my death willingly. And most probably liked it. At least I know I'm stupid.

Stupid hot fallen angels.