I need to hate on Romeo and Juliet for just a second. I just watched the Baz Luhrman movie from the 90's and I was impressed by the quality and sophistication of the film. But I still, despite a greater understanding of the story, Shakespeare, and the characters, hate this play.

A friend of mine has attempted to persuade me that this play is actually worth studying and enjoying; while I may or may not agree with the former, I don't know that I am capable of agreeing with the latter. There are two major issues at work in this play which make my appreciation of it or its themes possible. First, if things were different they would be different. What I mean by that, is that if any number of the final series of events had happened differently the two lovers could have shared a life together. That doesn't make tragedy for me, that makes a really, really bad day. Second, and this is the big one, I'm not sure I buy that Romeo and Juliet have true love.

Now, as I write that I am conscious of a line from Dan in Real Life where Dan scoffs his fourteen year old daughter for claiming she has fallen in love after only three days. Later on he falls in love after only three days and there is a moment there, a heartwarming, touching moment, that when it's right, no matter how melodramatic and seemingly impossible it is, it's right. The question for this great tragic romance I ask then, is this right? If Romeo and Juliet had lived, had babies, been poor (because they both would have been in exile in Mantua) and grown old--would their love have stood the test of time? There's no real way to predict as they both die a very young death, but everything in me as a viewer/reader says no.

I might be persuaded to believe it on Juliet's part. She is surprisingly mature and contained for a teenage girl. But Romeo, dear, dear Romeo, is a freakin' melodramatic horn-bag. First he loves Rosaline, and oh how he loves Rosaline! But then, then he sees Juliet and Rosaline's beauty is nothing compared to Juliet's! You could make a very strong argument that the only reason he really "falls in love" with Juliet is because she, unlike Rosaline, returns his affections. It's amazing how serious a crush can become once there is nookie to be had.

Now, maybe Romeo would shape up in the coming years. Maybe he would become a man that loves his wife and doesn't resent the poverty, the kids, or her waning beauty. Maybe he would never wander or see some new, younger beauty against whom Juliet pales. His decision to follow her into death might be proof of that. But is Romeo's decision a sign of true love or more melodrama from an already emotional and barely controlled character?

This play offers fantastic dialogue on revenge, thinking for yourself, breaking out of what you've been taught or brainwashed into believing. Read alongside The Merchant of Venice especially you see some definite themes of characters judged by what they are as opposed to who they are. These are great themes. I can write papers on these themes and talk at length in a very educated manner about what they mean, why they're important, etc.

But the love crap...I still believe that the "love" in this play serves as a vehicle for bigger themes and only becomes tragic because the kids don't die for true love. They die because they are impetuous teenagers in a horrific situation. If they had been allowed to live, their love would have steered its course and ended much more mundanely. I think we, as readers/viewers subsume the ideas of revenge and self-awareness behind this "love conquers all mentality" because the love theme is easier to relate to, to believe. If Romeo and Juliet are dying for love that might only be hormonal, impetuous, or unsophisticated then what does that mean for modern philosophies of love? If the point isn't that love is worth dying for, that you shouldn't, can't, go on without the one you love, then what is the point?

I think, in part, and this is really just me ranting here, that we continue to focus on the love of Romeo and Juliet because it's easier to feel heartbroken and angry over their deaths than it is to wrestle with questions of bigotry, hyper-emotion, and our own penchant for launching ourselves into relationships because we want so desperately to believe in love at first sight.

If Romeo and Juliet were real people, and if there were evidence that Romeo really did love Juliet in a long-lasting, healthy way there would be proof that love at first sight was a real thing. But what happens if Romeo's love is really just "you're the prettiest girl I've seen so far, and if you let me I'll love you forever. At least until a prettier girl comes along"?