So I'm walking home from school--always an exciting activity as I never know if I'll be honked at, asked if I'm on the "road to nowhere," or kissed by a homeless man. That's right--no one can say my life isn't eventful.

I pass a bus station every day, and many times an elderly Mexican man with a cowboy hat has been sitting at the bus stop. He's taken to smiling at me and I smile back because hey, I see the guy a few times a week as I pass by and my mother raised me to be polite. Today, though, today was like no other day. As I approach he smiles and I smile back. But then he raises his hands and says something. I pull my earphone out and he reaches out as if he wants to shake my hand. Not sensing any danger I grasp his hand to shake it, and he pulls it to him--what happened next couldn't be predicted by anyone.

He kissed my arm. That's right. Right there on the crook of my elbow. Just planted one on me. I still can't understand what he's saying, but I make out what sounds like "you're beautiful, you're beautiful" over and over again. Shocked, I bust out a thank you and he reaches up with his free hand--the other one still grasping the hand he pulled towards him to kiss my elbow--and pulls my head down so he can kiss my cheek. Then he kisses my hand once before I disentangle myself, still saying thank you, and walking away.

Now here's the thing: I have a fantasy--one of many actually. But in this particular fantasy a cowboy sees me walking down the street in L.V. and is so overcome with love/lust for me that he grabs me and kisses me before sweeping me off my feet and making the sweet loves to me. It's a fantasy, sure, but I've always felt it was a good one so far as fantasies go.

As evidenced by the story above, a man, in a cowboy hat, has seen me walking down the street and been so overcome with something for me that he has grabbed me and kissed me. That man was an elderly, most likely homeless, man with few teeth remaining. He was also several inches shorter than me--which only adds the oddity that he managed to get anywhere near my cheek for kiss number two.

Is the universe mocking me?!?!

Either, fate sent me a message to bolster my spirits and remind me of my astounding awesomeness through slightly unconventional means OR the universe has mocked me mercilessly and proven beyond all scientific certainty that my cowboy fantasy is not only a fantasy, but laughable and punishable by homeless kissing.

I don't know which it is, but I know I'm going to assume it's a message of hope. The other option is simply too disturbing and disheartening to consider.

No matter what it means, however, I'm claiming the title of Rockstar. I think I've earned it.