Vacation is over, school starts Tuesday and it's time for me to get back into the swing of things. I know for many of you there isn't much sympathy since your vacation ended the day after Christmas, and I'm not asking for any, just stating the obvious.

I've been a bit incognito the last two weeks--little email, fewer phone calls, and not much interaction with those I know. During that time I vacationed in the southwest like it was going out of style; I saw all of Las Vegas, some of it twice, L.A., San Diego, the Grand Canyon and more. As tired as I am now at the end of it all I am also rejuvenated, ready to enter back into the world at large. And I'm not unexcited for school to start, but neither do I relish the idea of hashing out my class, writing a syllabus, and beginning my next academic semester. I didn't really have a good first semester; it wasn't bad, but it wasn't my best. The question I'm faced with now is whether or not this semester will prove any different.

So what is the point of all of this rambling? Twofold--first to get back in the habit of blogging and second to try and find a thought that is worth rambling about. I'm not having very good luck.

In Thailand they seized a shipment of rat snakes from a plane, the second such shipment to be seized in the past year. I would like to point out the extreme negligence of the media in reporting that there are actually snakes on a plane--in fact, the very, very last thing I ever need to know is that snakes are ever shipped aboard a commercial flight. Very, very last thing I need to know.

Also there is a new strain of antibiotic resistant staph that is being labeled the new "gay disease". That one's a bit more disturbing since half-way through the article they finally acknowledge it isn't a "gay disease" at all, but the title and the first half of what is written doesn't make this clear. As a reporter you know people read the taglines for information, doesn't it seem a bit irresponsible to use a misleading, not to mention damaging, heading like that?

And I have finally seen both Evil Dead movies. I feel as if a large part of my movie education has been fulfilled now. It does behoove me to mention, however, that being raped by a tree, vines, or any other foliage is really uncool. It isn't as graphic and obvious in Evil Dead II and it was in Evil Dead, but that didn't make it less disturbing. I'm very anti rape by plant life. Aside from the wrongness of the situation there are other matters to consider like bark, little limbs sticking out on all sides, and possibly thorns. These are all issues a person doesn't have to worry about with normal rape, even rape of a demon variety. I can take tentacles, I can even take people, but don't be showing me possessed trees. Maybe the only thing worse than that is aliens.

Which brings to mind Aliens vs. Predator Requiem. In case some of you missed this masterpiece I really can't recommend you see it. It isn't all that good and it breaks the rules of horror movies for little more reason than the sake of breaking rules, something I'm never in support of. I thought of this because while no one is ever raped by the aliens in the traditional sense, there is some disturbing eating of one woman's uterus, and some even more disturbing use of a pregnant lady to hatch more aliens. This movie doesn't just kill kids, it kills babies and pregnant ladies. And it doesn't just kill the pregnant ladies (in labor no less) it corrupts their bodies and pregnancies to hatch more aliens (because of the predator/alien hybrid as seen at the end of the first AVP apparently has a completely different reproductive system). All of this could be very scary and very disturbing, but because there isn't really any point or reason to the decisions the writers or director makes it really just ends up being an exercise in horror movie masturbation. And to top it all off, in a moment which truly shows the ignorance of this movies education regarding women's bodies, the queen lays her eggs in the pregnant lady via the mouth and the aliens hatch out of her formerly fetus filled uterus. Aside from the ridiculousness of this scenario there is the very simple fact that women's digestive tracts don't connect to their reproductive system. Unless the director was figuring on the eggs somehow traveling through the placenta, but that's just dumb. Just like a stupid person to think that women are nothing but a giant cavity of emptiness waiting to be filled via vagina or mouth. I mock them all from afar and scoff at them for ruining what should have been a perfectly fun gore-filled adventure.

And that prompts me to jump to my last thought of this somewhat unconnected rambling--where have all the good action-horror movies gone? I'm not talking scary like The Ring or The Grudge or incredibly disturbing like Saw. I'm talking good old fashioned some thing monstrous kills a lot of people in a fairly entertaining, slightly frightening, but always ludicrous way. And the good guy wins. I miss those movies. I miss movies that sought to entertain, not always to disturb. And I miss movies that carried the capability of frightening the audience without permanently scarring the audience. Any more it seems the industry is more interested in the shock value, what can be shown that you would never want to see? What can be done to these characters that you'll wish you hadn't seen? How can the monsters do more than just kill people, but violate them as well? I see more and more of a trend that relies less on storytelling or really cool effects and much, much more, on grotesque images. That's just laziness.

Anyway, that's all I got right now. All I'm really doing is trying to put off schoolwork but the time has come. Next time I have a truly brilliant thought I'll do what I can to share it with you. Until then, same bat time, same bat channel.